Think, Christy! Think!

We all have something we would love to open up. It's probably something good and enlightening, or a past that we feel constricted to even mention a snippet of it. Everyone takes a different length of time to warm up, go through catharsis and disclose their subject. I am revealing this to a part of the Internet, but, I have yet to tell my own family members about my problem. I learnt about body dysmorphia disorder after I had written this entry. I didn't even know what to label it at that time. I was 16 then, I am turning 18 now. I was 14 when it all started.  Many people on the Internet have been disclosing this topic pretty recently, it made me happy. It's always a relief to know that you can relate to someone. But, the rise and fame of the subject created more controversies and doubts from others. So, for a long time, I said nothing about my issue, as I avoided being called an 'attention-seeker' by people. That was such a stupid thought. I feel awfully ...

Hello! I originally wanted to post another deep and heavy context blog today, but I cut off the plan as I needed some sort of cheeriness here. Things just doesn't seem too good for me these couple of days, and I wanted to lighten my mood up and hopefully brighten you with this post as well. So, here are all the stuff that I am enjoying at the moment. - Favourite Youtubers I am a Youtube-watcher FREAK. I watch Youtube videos 80% of my day, and have been doing that since I was fourteen. That's a good four years there. The list of my favourite Youtubers (let's be frank, I can't possibly pick my ALL TIME favourite one) changes all the time, but with that being said, these are the people whom I have been utterly obsessing over their contents at the moment.  Lilsimsie - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_TYFButglZuuDbD-0Q_IzQ            The Sims 4 is definitely one of my favourite games, and it just so happens that The Sims community on Youtube is f...

8/1/2018 Read the first part here -  https://thinkchristythink.blogspot.my/2017/12/a-review-on-only-4-ingredients-to-grow.html?showComment=1515468668751&m=1#c5038369193174517486 Can't believe a month has passed since I posted the first review.  Let me just be honest - In this past month, I haven't been consistent on drinking the solution, and I'm gonna tell you why.  Firstly, I know I said that the salty taste didn't bother me previously. Well, the saltiness got me eventually. Unless I was willing to handle the dryness in my mouth for the rest of that day, I would drink it two times a day, just like how I planned to. Secondly, stool problems. Holy crap. I should have taken the statement from the person on glowing.com a little more stronger than just a warning. For the first two weeks, I've been drinking it religiously, resulting in a really really REALLY bad constipation (Oh, the things I say on the Internet). It does make sense, as I don't think s...

This moment for me is like any other moments when your mind decides to surge in all the tasks you have done for the past few weeks, and you can't help but feel a little something-something, and somewhere within you is itching to write it all down, even though, most times no words can describe that silent emotion. I guess this is me after a work day - all pooped out from socializing, regardless on how 'embarrassing' or 'smooth' the interactions were -, my mind settles into a foreign calm zone. Oh yeah, this hasn't changed and it's been more than a year. Telemarketing is.. okay. I don't hate it, but it's not something I would consider doing for a long-term. It's draining, mentally. In that cold air tight room and all I do is sit on the office chair and dial numbers, well, only if I'm productive. The response that clip out from every customer's lips does get repetitive. The ones that stood out clearly to me, are the ones that either hurt...

7/12/2017 - Week One Around a week ago, I came across this video of a 13 year old girl (She was 13 when the video went up, as she stated) giving a tip on how to grow your breast, naturally. Of course, the video didn't just pop up in my 'Recommended', I actually searched up 'how to grow boobs' on Youtube. If you are close to me in real life, you know that I am pretty insecure of my small breast size, and it seems as though they haven't grown since I was thirteen. Now, as I am heading towards my very late teens, I am doing all the readings and researches on how to enlarge my chest - still taking the advantage of my puberty.   The recipe she shared in the video is excruciatingly simple and easy, I was dumbfounded. Immediately, I doubted on what she had said, but as I read through the comments, and was (also) surprised on how it worked out well on majority of the people.  I looked across the kitchen, and my eyes sat at the bottle of Pueraria Mirifica capsules ...

Growing up, I had been an extremely soft speaker. I remember teachers and elders would scrunch their eyebrows and lean their ears towards me whenever I had squeaked out an inaudible of mumble of answer. That doesn't happen to me anymore. Instead, I have to attempt to lower down my voice when I am talking to them. “What I hate about Christy the most?” One of my friends repeated the question in a The Answer Is Simple tone. “That's easy! It's the fact that I can barely hear anything she ever says.” Based on true experience. Through years of being told that I have a quiet voice, the statement did not offend me a single bit. It was a part of me that I accepted, though it annoyed some others. I embraced my gentle vocal anatomy, and I was even proud enough to say that it contributed to my innocently dumb and ignorant, Snow White-esque nature at that time. And then, college came along, rolling in endless assignments, group-works and presentations. It was not a problem for...

Falling in love is such a common dream, isn't it? Of course, I was no exception. I dreamt of a person sweeping my feet off the ground, sending me the wonderful electric jolts and making all my unrealistic expectations in life come true, taking my hazardous city life away to a beautiful, serene small town and we live happily ever after. Even until now, I will still do anything for my Fairy Godmother if it takes her to swish-and-swoosh this young dream into my reality. How I wish that a love life can go as smoothly and perfectly as we had imagined before acknowledging the rough patches to spark and maintain an intimacy. A lovely fairytale bedtime story. If there's one thing about me, is that I am a CRAZY dreamer. I have always loved reading fictional stories, and enjoy creating and developing characters (or, as fanfiction content creators call it ‘OC’s), visualising the lowest possibilities and making up the plot of my future plans. As you can probably puzzle it up, th...