Assignments are done, but wait! I have finals! And I talk about reasons to delete this blog (sorta).
When was the last time I wrote something here? Oops, more than a month ago.
Well, I don't have much to explain, other than I've been too caught up with... just college, in general. But, hey! My assignments are all completed for this semester, I am on a study break (in which I should be studying, but I can't be bothered to read another 200 pages of 'How To Start A Flipping Business'), and after my final exam, that will be in the next two weeks, I will be a free bird.
Okay, maybe not a bird. But, you get my point.
I GET IT! I hate reading posts that keep talking about 'Why I've been gone' or 'I'm gonna have more free time' and the writer ends up disappearing for another few months. It is ugly and cringey. Frankly, what isn't cringey on this whole blog? I tend to read back on older post and think to myself on why I even decided to included a snippet, or post a certain topic here.
Which also leads me to think why I disclosed this website to the real people in my life.
So, if future me is reading this. Please, just smack yourself in the face.
With all the questions I throw to myself, I believe that this is the reason that I hate being on social media so much. Yes, a blog website is considered a social media page. For the record, I am not on any other social media platforms, aside from Facebook, which reveal all the embarrassing things my past self has done.
I have mentioned this once, but I am going to talk about it again. To me, social media is not reality. Everything here is deceiving. People go on these pages to let anonymous see them on how they want to be seen. Some posts nice pictures, others can be professional ranters. Following your real life friends on social media, and consider it as 'catching-up' is bullshit. I don't know if this is a little out from the topic I want to touch.
I started this blog last year, and slowly made the decision to post about a side of me. The more insecure side of me. Remember, Gestalt said that 'the whole is something else than the sum of its parts'. Scrolling through all the posts that I felt confident enough to publish, one will think that I am just a mess. Well, I really am a mess as a person. I guess what I am trying to tell here is that there's more to me than just this blog. There are more things that I am experiencing than the ones I have talked about on here.
On top of that, related with 'everything here is deceiving', most of the content that I post are not as extreme and exaggerated as I make it sound. It all comes down with penning down a topic with a wrong frame of mind. Emotions cannot be trusted wholly, and it alters the real situation.
Regarding on allowing real life friends to read my blog. I still feel iffy about it. It can feel uncomfortable to know that someone has read about my personal and vulnerable topics, which I will never ever bring up in a real life conversation. It is unfair, that they can have impressions and judge me by reading a certain topic that I disclose on here. HERE! It's just a blog. But, like I mentioned about social media, it is not our reality. Therefore, it isn't something that they have to face with me in real life. This whole connection with my blog should be just read and not take.
I thought thoroughly and I am passed that fearful stage of deleting this website that I put so much of effort in. So what if someone who shouldn't not have read my blog reading everything? (You know who you are.) I have made the conscious decision to put myself in harm's way, and it's all from my passion. This is what social media do, it tells people leaked stories that they shouldn't know about. If this is the only platform that I am willing to be on, I might as well get over with the disadvantages, and not give a heck on whatever that gets thrown at me.
I had hit my funny bone three times and am getting attacked by mosquitoes to write this blog. I am craving grapes and wine. I told you, there are more things that I am experiencing than the topics I post. All these first world problems. (I'm not sure if this country is even a first world country.) Definitely not important to mention in a blog, but I just felt that it was necessary to end it this way.
Well, I don't have much to explain, other than I've been too caught up with... just college, in general. But, hey! My assignments are all completed for this semester, I am on a study break (in which I should be studying, but I can't be bothered to read another 200 pages of 'How To Start A Flipping Business'), and after my final exam, that will be in the next two weeks, I will be a free bird.
Okay, maybe not a bird. But, you get my point.
I GET IT! I hate reading posts that keep talking about 'Why I've been gone' or 'I'm gonna have more free time' and the writer ends up disappearing for another few months. It is ugly and cringey. Frankly, what isn't cringey on this whole blog? I tend to read back on older post and think to myself on why I even decided to included a snippet, or post a certain topic here.
Which also leads me to think why I disclosed this website to the real people in my life.
So, if future me is reading this. Please, just smack yourself in the face.
With all the questions I throw to myself, I believe that this is the reason that I hate being on social media so much. Yes, a blog website is considered a social media page. For the record, I am not on any other social media platforms, aside from Facebook, which reveal all the embarrassing things my past self has done.
I have mentioned this once, but I am going to talk about it again. To me, social media is not reality. Everything here is deceiving. People go on these pages to let anonymous see them on how they want to be seen. Some posts nice pictures, others can be professional ranters. Following your real life friends on social media, and consider it as 'catching-up' is bullshit. I don't know if this is a little out from the topic I want to touch.
I started this blog last year, and slowly made the decision to post about a side of me. The more insecure side of me. Remember, Gestalt said that 'the whole is something else than the sum of its parts'. Scrolling through all the posts that I felt confident enough to publish, one will think that I am just a mess. Well, I really am a mess as a person. I guess what I am trying to tell here is that there's more to me than just this blog. There are more things that I am experiencing than the ones I have talked about on here.
On top of that, related with 'everything here is deceiving', most of the content that I post are not as extreme and exaggerated as I make it sound. It all comes down with penning down a topic with a wrong frame of mind. Emotions cannot be trusted wholly, and it alters the real situation.
Regarding on allowing real life friends to read my blog. I still feel iffy about it. It can feel uncomfortable to know that someone has read about my personal and vulnerable topics, which I will never ever bring up in a real life conversation. It is unfair, that they can have impressions and judge me by reading a certain topic that I disclose on here. HERE! It's just a blog. But, like I mentioned about social media, it is not our reality. Therefore, it isn't something that they have to face with me in real life. This whole connection with my blog should be just read and not take.
I thought thoroughly and I am passed that fearful stage of deleting this website that I put so much of effort in. So what if someone who shouldn't not have read my blog reading everything? (You know who you are.) I have made the conscious decision to put myself in harm's way, and it's all from my passion. This is what social media do, it tells people leaked stories that they shouldn't know about. If this is the only platform that I am willing to be on, I might as well get over with the disadvantages, and not give a heck on whatever that gets thrown at me.
I had hit my funny bone three times and am getting attacked by mosquitoes to write this blog. I am craving grapes and wine. I told you, there are more things that I am experiencing than the topics I post. All these first world problems. (I'm not sure if this country is even a first world country.) Definitely not important to mention in a blog, but I just felt that it was necessary to end it this way.
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